Imagine the following scenario: Someone, maybe an irritable boss or an overwrought spouse, is giving you a tongue-lashing. The diatribe comes to an end, and your very natural inclination is to retaliate. Under normal circumstances, you wouldn’t back down from such astimulating sparring session, but suddenly, for whatever reason, you decide to restrain yourself and not respond in kind. As the moments pass, a certain feeling of empowerment and even serenity over takes you. “Hey, this feels good, exhilarating, how did I do that?” you say.
What you have just experienced is a tremendous virtuous act of self-control concerning which the great Vilna Gaon revealed, “Each and every minute that a person seals his mouth he merits to see the Ohr Ha’ganuz (hidden light) that no angel or living being can fathom.” It is almost like mental martial arts. Not one “punch” was necessary to diffuse thetension, and you received tremendous reward for the effort! A win/ win scenario all around.
Parry, Aaron (2003-03-04). The Complete Idiot's Guide to the Talmud (p. 216). DK Publishing. Kindle Edition.